A White Christmas
by Insanity under the moonlight
Summary: In which Matthew plays referee in a game of man vs wild. For landofbeesandfandom for the 2015 Prucan gift exchange. Happy holidays!


Ahaha...so...New Year's is the new Christmas? Still Tis the season?...Okay sorry this is late-not-quite-late. I have a hard time with open requests so I was like 'What to write, is this trash? Will she like this?' and in the end even I didn't know the plot until I finished this.

Not very romantic, but I hope you can still enjoy it. Merry late Christmas and happy Prucan!

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"This is a bad idea."

That was a holiday catchphrase at this point, and this time is was Gilbert's turn to deliver the punch line.

"What could possibly go wrong?" He said with a smirk as he tugged on a white tuque low enough to cover his ears.

"Oh I don't know, you could get hypothermia. Get lost and _then_ catch hypothermia. Or worst of all, get lost and catch hypothermia, forcing me to come outside and retrieve your frozen corpse for defrosting." Matthew said with amusement, causing a scowl to form on Gilbert's face. A sense of endearment welled up in Matthew's chest as he watched Gilbert slip on the borrowed white parka. Where it ended mid-thigh on Matthew reached just above Gilbert's knees.

"Have a little faith in my abilities. Besides, it's your land, it's not like you'd have to look that hard." He grumbled as he tried to push up the heavy sleeves in order to zip up the jacket, the fingertips of his middle fingers barely peeked out.

Smiling to himself Matthew decided to take pity on the other nation. Moving close enough to touch his socked feet to the hard soles of Gilbert's winter boots, Matthew grabbed both ends of the open jacket and zipped the metal teeth together in one fluid movement with practiced ease. Matthew then adjusted the ecru scarf around Gilbert's neck to cover the lower half of his face and handed him a set of eggshell white mittens. After brushing off the invisible dirt Matthew nodded to himself before deciding to respond, "I thought the point was for us not to find you. Or Kumashiro anyways."

"Why do you have so much white?" Gilbert muttered to himself as he looked down at himself.

"You tend to pick things up over the years. Besides, I never intended to wear all of them at the same time." Matthew said with a bit of mirth. "Ah, almost forgot." He murmured absently as he grabbed the thick furry rim of the hood and pulled it over Gilbert's head, snapping the buttons together to keep it in place.

Shifting his significantly increased weight, Gilbert attempted to say something, but to Matthew's great amusement he might as well have been gagged for all the sense it made.

Gilbert seemed to huff before pulling Matthew's meticulous work away from his mouth. Yet when he opened his mouth, instead of speech Gilbert started sputtering as if he'd tasted something bad. Matthew couldn't contain his quiet laughter when the albino then proceeded to attempt to wipe off this substance with his fluffy mitts. Finally taking note of his audience, Gilbert flashed him a charming smile, "Lint in my mouth." He explained dismissively before continuing, "It's getting really hot in here, can I go outside now?"

"Jeeze, you have five minutes to hide yourself before I release Kuma." Matthew reminded him as he opened the door for Gilbert to shuffle through. "I still think this is a bad idea- remember not to go out of bounds!" Matthew called after him as he watched Gilbert run towards the treeline.

"Well…ready Kuma?"

"Why do only I have to go outside?" Kumajuro asked sullenly as he toyed with the end of his peach scarf.

Matthew raised his hands in surrender, "You argued with Gil, I'm just the prize."

He couldn't help but sigh to himself every time he thought about their little contest. He just had to open his mouth and comment on their similar colouration which of course led to a pissing match about who had better camouflage. When it seemed like Gilbert was about to get into a fist fight with a polar bear Matthew thought a friendly game of hide and seek would settle thing.

It made things so much worse.

Now that it was an actual competition Gilbert was determined to win despite the fact that Kumahiro clearly didn't care about it anymore. Which was how he ended up loaning Gilbert his white winter apparel in order to improve his odds at winning this game of outdoor Hide 'n' Seek. One of the more memorable points of mapping out the logistics of the competition was the legality of Gilbert wearing clothes, since it was a contest of _natural_ camouflage, and Kumajuju really knew how to persuade…

"Alright, out you go Kuma. You remember what we're doing right?" Matthew asked with just a smidge of genuine concern as he re-opened the door.

"Find the snowman." Kumajito said a little too absently for Matthew's tastes.

"Uh, right. Snowman meaning Gilbert right?" The lack of response only set off a few more warning bells. "...Right!?"

Reluctantly, Matthew shut the door before any more snow could be blown in. They'd be fine, Kumajiji had proven himself to be just as adept at hunting as his mortal counterparts in not more. They'd be fine…

...Who was he kidding, he might was well prepare the first-aid kit and bring out the heated blankets. Luckily he had the foresight to enforce a half-hour time limit, because knowing Gilbert he would be out there searching all night if that's what it took to succeed.

While his tenacity was one of his best features, it was occasionally his downfall.

Shaking his head, Matthew decided to play the waiting game in the comfort of his living room. Christmas carols were playing softly through the stereo system and the smell of gingerbread was starting to drift out of the kitchen. As Matthew was about to approach the oven to check on them, the sound of someone franticly knocking on glass startled him. He had a good idea of just who was trying to break his glass sliding door. Drawing back the curtain, Matthew felt pretty smug to see Gilbert quickly motioning at the handle in hopes that he would be let in.

He should know by now that Matthew had no mercy in matters of winter sport.

Gilbert pointed at the handle aggressively. _Let me in!_

Matthew gave him a look of faux confusion. _What, in_ here _? I thought you were playing a game?_

Gilbert smirked and wagged a finger. _I'm still in bounds._

Matthew was not amused and showed it by closing the curtains. Yet seconds later he peeked out of them to see Gilbert's pleading face. _Pleeeeease?_

Matthew rolled his eyes before letting him in. "You are such a cheater. You're lucky Kuma probably isn't even looking."

"The best defense is a good offense," Said Gilbert as he tried not to track in snow. "The house has a good vantage point…and cookies. Are they done?"

"The Abominable Snowman gets none. Take all that stuff off and clean up that puddle and I'll think about it." Matthew headed back towards the oven to complete his original task.

"Done and done…I see you already prepared for the worst." Said Gilbert from the living room, and Matthew could hear him shaking the first-aid kit to emphasize just what he was talking about.

Mindful of the heat, Matthew removed the tray of gingerbread men to allow them to cool on the counter. "I never know with you, especially when you get competitive."

"Are you joking!? You've literally had riots about _hockey games_. If anyone here gets a little intense about games, it's you! Do I need to remind you about two days ago? At that sports bar?" Gilbert ranted, completely unaware of Matthew mimicking his tirade.

"Yeah, yeah, I didn't ask you to bail me out!" Matthew said as he walked into the room and flopped onto the couch and leaned on Gilbert.

"You're lucky you're hot, otherwise you wouldn't be worth all this trouble." Gilbert grumbled before slipping his arm around the other's waist.

"That should be my line. For your sake I hope Kumajiri comes home soon, or else you're going back out there to find him."

"What? Why? He's a bear, he's made for the wild."

"I thought you were the ultimate hunter?"

"The ultimate hunter knows where the bigger game is."

"Are you calling me fat?"

"You are pretty big, but what I'm saying is- jesus fucking Christ!" Gilbert shouted with a start, nearly throwing Matthew to the ground while in his grip.

"Found him. Are we done now?" asked Kumajuru, still gripping the hem of Gilbert's horrible green Christmas sweater.

"How the fuck did he get inside!" Gilbert had yet to lower his voice or loosen his grip of the fabric over his chest.

"The door?" Kumahiro said as though it were obvious. Judging by the look Matthew was giving him, apparently it was.

"Excuse me for not realizing a talking bear was also in possession of house keys." Gilbert grumbled before pouting to himself.

"Now that we're all here, how about you two split the prize and I let both of you eat the leftover frosting? They should be cool enough to decorate by now." Matthew offered.

"Fair enough."

In the end, it was the frosting that Matthew should have worried about, not frostbite.

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The end! I hope you liked it, and if it wasn't what you wanted you can send me a prompt.


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